How to Calm and Comfort Children (5 to 6)

5 to 6 "AM I DOING IT RIGHT?" by Ellen Booth Church

Many 5- and 6-year-olds are at a stage of development where they want everyone to think that they are really "big." But inside, they still have fears of separation when dealing with a new situation. A sense of comfort and calm is essential to helping the 5- and 6-year-old deal with changes. Through observation and developmental knowledge, there are many ways to assist them.

1) Building Reference Points

Serene environment soothes the mind.

A comfortable classroom

We all use the familiar to help us find our way in a new place or to help us feel comfortable in a new setting.  Five- and 6-year-olds too, particularly in a new school setting, look for the familiar. This is why many kindergarten programs appropriately start the year looking more like a preschool than kindergarten. The incoming children feel much more comfortable when they see the familiar blocks, easel, and dramatic play centres. From the familiar play centre, social interaction can begin.

2) Setting the Stage

Some kindergartens invite children to familiarise themselves at the kindergarten before school starts. They are allowed to participate in the  play-based  orientation programme or just allowed to play with any toys there. After making a connection at a new environment, children feel more connected to the teacher when they go off for the first day of kindergarten.

3)Touching Base

Have you ever had a child who (even during free playtime) keeps coming back to you to be sure he is doing it "right" or to show you what he is doing? This is touching base behavior and it is one way that children build a sense of comfort in school. This behavior is related to the 5- and 6-year-old's need for approval and dependence on authority. Kindergartners are eager to please and thrive on praise. Simple and specific acknowledgments of positive behaviors and "good works" can make 5- and 6-year-olds feel the comfort of support within the structure of the classroom.

4) Creating Consistency

The kindergarten year is a transitional stage where children both want to know who is "in authority" and have some sense of control over their life choices. It is important to sensitively provide both. A classroom with consistent and predictable structure helps children feel comfortable, safe, and calm. Five- and 6-year-olds are at a stage where they want to know what is expected of them. That doesn't mean that they will always comply, but for the most part, they want to be cooperative and helpful. However, it is also important to provide flexibility within the structure of the day. Offer choices (always ones you can accept) so that the S- or 6-year-old child has some sense of autonomy within your authority.

5) Playing Dramatically

It's through dramatic play that children express their thoughts and feelings. As you well know, kindergartners in the beginning of the year are often better at showing you something than saying it. Children use dramatic play to feel comfortable in a new setting. Watch their play and you will see issues of separation, insecurity, and fear being worked out actively. By me end of the year, they will be able to talk about all this. But as the year begins, give them a large space for dramatic play that allows them to work through issues of adjusting to the "big school."

At the core of anyone's sense of comfort and calm is a strong sense of self. When you provide children with consistent structure, reference and touch points, and dramatic-play situations, you can be sure you're meeting the developmental needs of your new kindergartners.